Saturday before last was my wife’s surprise baby shower. It also happened to be Father’s Day but I had been so busy with subterfuge in keeping the surprise in surprise baby shower that I had forgotten.
During the Jack and Jill event (that means boys can come too, as my niece would say), I receive a large (11” x 17”), homemade card from my niece that read “Happy Farther’s Day Uncle, Number 1 Uncle/Farther.” It had a yellow background with black diagonal stripe, with a large “F” on the bottom, and a caricature of myself at the top-left.
When I reach out to grab it, my niece told me she had to read it first. Quite nervously she began as a room of about twenty listened on:
Thank you Uncle
For coming to my open house…letting me sleep over…caring for me…helping me when I need it...taking me out for breakfast…holding me…carrying…taking me places when mommy can’t...inviting [my friend] to your baby shower…teaching me to clean…coming to my sixth birthday…for my first dollar on my birthday…taking me to the beach…being funny…letting my use your computer…thinking I can do it when I say, “I can’t”…making aunty my aunt…believing in me…leaving your love with me...being with me…caring for me…taking me to the museum…teaching me…putting me to sleep…helping me with my shoe laces…thank you for always helping me.
The room was stunned. Not only because this particular niece has written the card herself, but the things she was thanking me for spanned at least three years. Of course my wife was bawling her eyes out (hormones nonewithstanding).
As I went back in my minds eye and looked back over the last twelve years of being a surrogate dad to my nieces, I realized in spite of my reservation about how kids are faring in today’s world we parents and surrogates must continue fighting in the name of love for all children. Children notice and it does make a difference.
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