So, I was in church last Sunday, and the pastor and bishop began politicizing about married folks taking a stand against gay marriage, by a follow-up to the church's rally at the State House last week. The alleged purpose being to lobby the state legislature to allow the question of gay marriage to be put on the ballot for the voters of Massachusetts to vote. I agree with the purpose, but not the means to that end. The people should get to vote on this issue.
To take things further, married couples were asked to stand in support of marriage being between a man and a woman and against… [insert rhetoric about the demon of homosexuality].
This is where I had to take a stand, by sitting down, while my wife stood. On the ride home I explained my position. While she didn't interpret the sermon in the manner that I did, she understood my position.
First and foremost I believe in the separation of church and state. Church leaders should not engage in politics, short of their right to vote, and holders of public office should knock of religious rhetoric, short of practicing their religion.
Now to be clear, I have and do understand that marriage is between a man and a woman. However, I don’t need a definition of marriage added to the constitution to remind me. Furthermore, I don’t support changing the Federal constitution to include a ban against gay marriage. For one thing, it’s unconstitutional on the grounds that the issues of marriage and civil unions are for individual states to decide. Also, I believe that arguments on both extremes of this issue have divisive effects on our communities and nation by further hostility.
Case in point, the pastor continued, relating an incident of a gay rights advocates beating down a sister of the church who handed them a flyer at the previous week’s rally. It was so bad, according to the pastor, that the State Police interceded in her defense and arrest the perpetrators. Talk like that does nothing to unite a people, especially when the story is not an objective one (i.e. all sides of the story).
I felt that first of all, the pastor and leadership could have done more to bring the community together rather than separate it. Because, if the pastor is right in saying only 2% (reported that is) of the population is gay, that would mean at least 100 people in the church were gay, let’s not even start to talk to those who have had a gay experience, or gay attraction, or are on the down-low (i.e. those who say their heterosexual but are really bisexual). 100 people that for whatever reason decided to come to church on that Sunday, maybe for the first time. Subtext of gay-people-are-demons, but-the-rest-of-us-sinners-aren’t, does nothing to bring them closer to Christ.
Second, the King James Version (KJV) of the bible uses "sexual immorality", rather than the more popular "homosexuality" in later versions. The former refers to not only homosexuality, but also includes adultery and fornication. However, adultery and fornication don’t get as much airplay because they are more culturally acceptable and/or indulged in, within and without the church.
As a Christian, I know Jesus would want me to welcome ALL sinners to the church regardless of their sins “for ALL have sinned and come short of the glory of God” (Romans 3:23 KJV).
As far as the political debate goes, I don’t believe a ban on gay marriage, legalization of gay marriage, or a definition of marriage is the issue. The New Jersey Supreme Court decision put it best by ruling yesterday, according to the Boston Metro, that same-sex couples are entitled to the same rights as heterosexuals, but not giving an OK to gay marriage, their reason being“The issue is not about the transformation of the traditional definition of marriage, but about the unequal dispensation of benefits and privileges to one of two similarly situated classes of people.”
So last weekend I had the pleasure of joining one of my best friends on a motorcycle demo ride. This is where a motorcycle dealership or manufacturer let riders take new models out for a spin in the hopes that a future purchase may be considered. Unlike with cars, it’s never a hard sell. There is absolutely no pressure to buy. It’s really to generate buzz via word-of-mouth about the new models. Plus, they had free BBQ!
Anyway, this was to be a BMW motorcycle demo ride so we were quite excited to have an opportunity to ride all the nice, expensive, and wonderfully engineered Beemers. Even thought BMW isn’t my preferred motorcycle brand, I like them enough to ride them given the opportunity. However, when it comes to motorcycling I’m more of a minimalist. Therefore, things like GPS, cruise control, a 6-CD changer, and heated seats on a motorcycle are way more than I need. I mean if I’m going to have all that, I’d rather be driving a BMW.
Anyway, we discovered that not only did this dealership sell BMW motorcycles, it also sold Ducati Motorcycles. Just to paint a picture, if Ferrari wanted to make motorcycles, they would have named the company Ducati. So, while I could have ridden any BMW I wanted, I decide to ask if I could demo a Ducati, specifically a Ducati Monster. Even though it was a BMW demo ride day the owner obliged me and brought out a brand spanking new, Ducati Monster S2R for my riding pleasure.
After thirty minutes aboard the Ducati, I revved back into the dealership with my friend looking on. For the rest of the day we sounded like the two old ladies in the Citibank ID theft commercial:
“No, no it was like WHAAAAAAA…WHAAAAAAA...WHAAAAAAA”
“Uh-uh, it went BRAAAAH-BRAAAAH-BRAAAAH-BRAAAAH
“Fun tho, shoot.”
“Yeah, shoot.”
This week I found myself, wondering about who my friends are, due to a sermon I had heard. Relatives are important, the sermon said, but friends are essential. We have different levels and frequencies of friendship. The sermons asked to select three friend who had been the most exemplary in the past year and why. My three coincidentally, or perhaps not, where my three best friends. If God only gave me three friends, I would pick these three people.
As I looked at my reasons why these friends had top marks. I thought back to my friendship with each and how each has gone beyond the call of duty for a friend. These three friends have done things for me that I’ve needed but would never have the courage to ask. They have also helped me remove specks and logs out of my eyes when needed. We have fought hard, and we’ve played hard. They are people I turn to for serious advice on the big things in life; do I cut the blue wire, or the red wire?
These friends (like me) aren’t perfect, and have done things I haven’t agreed with (and vice-versa), but my relationship with each of these friends is very authentic in that we speak our minds while respecting each other. Most importantly, I strive to be, and I believe I succeed, in being the type of friend to them, that I wish them to be to me.
